1. All the cells being full and having to wait hours to book people into custody after driving them halfway across the county.
2. Pissed up teenagers. We took a 13 year old girl and 2 15 year old boys home on Friday alone because they were busy puking in the street.
3. Crap pub licencees. Actually, just one. Who called for our help then gave us a load of abuse. It's been noted Mrs X!
4. Phone calls reporting harassment ongoing for a year. Right, and you chose to call us now? That'll be cos you're pissed then?
5. Not having enough Police officers to properly Police our area. Me and 3 PC's between 5pm and 10pm. At which point another Sergeant and 2 PC's came on duty. Strangely enough, the Chief Constable lives in another part of the County. As does the local MP. Coincidence?
6. My burger going cold because of a "flash" job coming in. A particularly crap "flash" job that involved two sisters arguing over something or other. (I'd have more details but I was thinking about my burger).
7. The step-father of said 13 year old girl who just said, "she's not my daughter, can't you do anything?" when we took her home.
8. The woman reporting theft of money from her house by one of her friends:
Her - "I'm not threatening her, but I'm going to kill her".
Me - "That's kind of a threat though, isn't it?"
Her - "You know I don't mean it. I'm just going to beat her up".
Me - "Riiiggghhht."
9. The bloke we nicked for fighting with a group of males outside a kebab shop. His friend had started the fight and come off worse.
Him - "He's my mate he is"
Me - "So what actually happened?"
Him - "See him? He's my mate."
Me - "Yep, I can see him. He's your mate. How did he get his injuries?"
Him - "I'm his mate and he's my mate. We're mates."
Me - "Yes, you said. But I need to find out what's happened".
Him - "We've been mates for years. He's my mate."
Me - "Really? You should've said".
10. The bloke who jumped out infront of our van whilst we were on a blue light run shouting "Taxi" at the top of his voice. Van full of coppers in unison "Idiot!" (or words to that effect)
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3 comments:
9-where I work theres quite a big Polish 'community'(aka lots of Polish labourers) and after you break up a fight its all hugs and 'we are friends yes?' me,'no mate,you're both nicked'
9 - I was approaching a kebab shop when I heard the sound of raised voices. The last comment I heard, as I was about six feet from the door, was "Go on then, hit me if you want to.." This was followed by a crack, and the issuer of said invitation dropped through the doorway. As he came round, he looked up at me and said "What are you gonna do about that then?". What do you think ? ....
Assailant's immediate response to probing was, of course, "He asked me to do it, you heard him. He's my mate, if he wants me to do something, I always try my best to help him out....."
No paperwork raised...
The woman reporting theft really said that to you?! How stupid can you get?!
Your side of the conversation had me in stitches :D...I mean, "That's kind of a threat though isn't it?" ;) And the bloke outside the kebab shop...what an idiot!
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